Out of the Mouths of Babes

Ami: People are constantly marveling at my vocabulary. Yes, it is quite extensive for someone my age, but there is also the shock value of my mispronunciations to consider. Here is a list of some you might appreciate.

Ass - hat (OK, that was two months ago. I can say "hat" now)
Slut - slide (It's really more like "slud," but people hear what they're gonna hear)
Piss - piece (Like when I want a "piss" of "patza")
MILF - milk (I've never actually said MILF, but like I said, people hear what they hear)
Dump - I mean it as a verb, but when I bring Mommy a full potty and yell "DUMP!" (it in the toilet), for some reason she laughs.
Dick - stick (That's what I call my hockey stick. Let's just say Mommy's thrilled I can pronounce "puck.")

Elianaisms

Eliana: For the most part my parents subtly correct me if I make an error (grammatical or otherwise) in my speech. But some things I say are so cute it seems they almost encourage me to keep saying them.

Allabody - everybody

Wiper towel - paper towel

Eatmeal - oatmeal

Recently Mommy started using "itioner" (conditioner) in my hair. Sometimes I call it Uncle Itioner. (In tribute to my Uncle Izzy.)

Also, I have trouble pronouncing words that start with "s" followed by another consonant. For example:

pall - small

pot - spot

keem - scream

sand - stand

pill - spill

sicky - sticky

poon - spoon

pile - smile

When I'm in a bad mood I get upset if anyone piles at me. Especially Ami. He always seems to pile at me when I'm crying.

Nanananananana

Eliana: Sometimes when Mommy doesn't want me to do something (like when she grabs the milk away from me as I'm about to pour it myself, or when I try to give Ami something he's not allowed to have) she says "n-n-n-n-n-n-no." Today she asked me a question and my answer was "n-n-n-n-n-n-no." That sounded like a song I knew, so I stood up and started singing "na na na na na na na" and doing the chicken dance. Then I suddenly broke out into "na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na, na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na BATMAN!"

The babyproofing has officially begun

Ami: I am really crawling now! (Of course I chose the day Daddy left for South Africa to start making extra trouble for Mommy.) Daddy claims I've been crawling for about a month already. Mommy has seen me drag myself army-style across the room a couple of times but for the most part if she put me down with some toys I just stay in one spot. Today she put me down and I was off like a shot! She had to chase after me and close the doors to the bathroom and bedrooms before I got myself into trouble. She's not sure if the way I crawl is more funny or more adorable. I drag one knee behind me, as if I don't want to totally give up on being in a sitting position. (I just really started sitting myself up not long ago as well.) Who cares what it looks like? It works for me!

For the most part I am playing in this video, but there are a few good shots of me crawling. Grandma was watching me on the Webcam so you can hear her talking in the background.



I pulled myself to standing for the first time almost 2 weeks ago. I used Mommy's skirt for leverage and was very proud of myself. I have stood up in my crib a couple of times (it makes going to sleep much more difficult) but mostly I like to pull myself up and stand by the couch. Sometimes I forget that my balance isn't all there yet and I let go. Good thing there's usually an adult with their hands out just in case.

Graduation Day

Ami: Mommy finally caught me army-crawling across the room yesterday. Daddy says I've been doing it for at least a week but when Mommy puts me down I just stay in one place. Maybe it's to feed her desire to keep me from growing up too quickly. Daddy also says I sign "eat" (or at least point to my mouth when I'm hungry), but Mommy's never seen that. I know she would be happy if I signed.

Eliana: Today was my preschool graduation. First there was a processional of all four classes out to the chairs set up on the playground. (I stopped and had to be brought to the "stage" personally by one of the teachers.)

Then all the classes sang songs together and then each class got up and sang one special song. Ours was "Wheels on the Bus." I love that song. I didn't actually sing in front of the crowd, though. I know the words to all the songs; I don't feel the need to prove anything to anyone. When it was time for my class to stand up, I was shy and stayed in my seat. Mommy got up and helped me.



I had my hand in my mouth most of the time, which is what I do when I'm shy or nervous. I even sucked my thumb for part of the time, something I learned from my classmate Ezzy. I didn't want to wear my bus crown either. Eventually I put it on top of my hat.

When I got home and the pressure was off, I sang all the songs. Here I am singing some of them with Mommy at bed time:



Maybe when I'm older I'll like to stand up in front of an audience like Daddy. Or maybe I'll be shy in front of a crowd like Mommy. The important thing is that they let me be myself.

Water Baby, the Sequel

Ami: Today was my first swimming lesson. People asked whether I liked it. Daddy said "he didn't hate it." Mommy said that means I liked it.

Getting my feet wet:





Meeting the class:



Trying to eat a pool noodle:



My first "dive":



Backfloat:

If You're Happy and You Know It

Ami: I can't stop clapping my hands. Everything makes me want to clap. Even when Mommy changes my diaper in the middle of the night and I'm half asleep.

Fishie in Training

Ami: Here are my underwater pictures. Grandma says than most of them I look like I'm asking "why are they doing this to me?"







Ami: Here are my underwater pictures. Grandma says that in most of them I look like I'm asking "why are they doing this to me?"

The bubbles are impressive. My teacher is trying to teach everyone in my class to blow bubbles underwater and I just seem to do it naturally.

Hostess with the Mostest

Eliana: Mommy was making dinner tonight and I cleared a spot at the table for Rebecca (my babysitter). I gathered up all of Mommy's papers that were on the table and tried to throw them in the trash but Mommy insisted on saving them. Rebecca was busy washing dishes and I kept telling her to sit down and eat with us.

Mommy was pouring the last of the salsa onto her rice and I shouted "No!! Save some for Rebecca!" Mommy assured me that there was another jar of salsa in the fridge. So I opened the fridge, got out the salsa, and put it on the counter.

Hat trick

Ami: When we were out visiting friends today, I figured out how to take off my hat. Here is the conversation that ensued.

Mommy: Ami took off his hat!
Eliana: Why?
Mommy: Because babies like to take off their hats. When you were a baby you liked to take off your hat.
Eliana: I a baby now. [takes off her hat]

Two years later....

and Coby's ears still don't come off. I'm not quite as persistent as my sister was, though.

Sleep training, take 2

Ami: Mommy says it's time I learned to STTN (sleep through the night). See Eliana's post on the same subject.

Mommy is trying to Ferberize me. I don't like the sound of that. For now she's just trying to teach me to get to sleep on my own, without being "potched" (patted on the tush). If I cave in to that it can only get worse, so I'd better not fall for any of her tricks.

Separation Anxiety

Ami: Every time I see my Mommy I burst into tears. Is this normal?

Position Filled: Baby Translator

Ami: I am so lucky my sister speaks Baby. She translates for me all the time. When I was crying today, Mommy asked if I wanted a paci or milk. Eliana said milk. Sure enough, that's exactly why I was crying.

When we're in the car she often tells the driver "Ami no like bumps." She must be a mind reader - I don't even cry or anything!

Eliana: I also know when he's cold - even when he's wearing three layers. I make sure to cover him or tell someone to cover him. "Ami needs banket."

Goldilocks and the Three Bears

Eliana: Months ago Daddy bought me a book of fairy tales in London. Mommy and Daddy have been indoctrinating me, reading me the story of Go'locks and the Three Bears whenever I'm willing to listen. It worked. They got me all excited about my costume for Purim. Of course, when Mommy was making bear hats for Daddy, Ami and herself I wanted to know where mine was. (Uncle Izzy predicted that would happen.) I was thrilled to wear my costume to school on Sunday. But every day it got a little less fun until I had to be bribed to get into my costume for th Purim meal at Aunt Rachel's house today. And I refused to wear pigtails anymore. But that was ok because it was so hot today that Mommy didn't have the heart to make Ami wear his sweatsuit and fleece hat either.


Here I am with my teacher, Mo' Innea (Morah Andrea):


Here I am giving Ami a pretend bottle:


Playing Goldilocks with Yuval:

Mommy's Best Helper

Eliana: Mommy had to leave the room for a minute today so she put Ami down in his chair. He started crying so I went over to him and said "Ami, Mommy coming." Then I gave him a toy and said "Ami, thisa you" (this is for you" and rocked him in his chair. He stopped crying and when Mommy came back he was smiling at me!

I like to do lots of things with Ami, like sing to him, clap his hands, share Mommy's lap with him, read him books, and pretend to feed him things that I've cooked in my play kitchen. (Today it was soup and carrots.)

Later Mommy was cooking some zucchini and I wanted to help. I said "I wanna sand dayer" (I wanna stand there) so Mommy pulled the step stool up to the counter and showed me how to dip each slice of zucchini in egg and then in bread crumbs and put it in the pan.

Eliana: I had fun playing at my friends Sara and Rafaela's house today. Their mommy teaches a music class so we got to play with all the instruments and props.






I don't know the song about the glasses but that didn't stop me from trying them on!



We got pretty creative with the instruments. Who says they have to be used for making music?

Chanuka, oh Chanuka

Eliana: On Friday was my school's Chanuka party. First I showed Mommy how we use glitter.



Then I decorated a cookie,



ate it,



and made sure the leftover sprinkles didn't go to waste.



After that my class got up and sang a Chanuka song. Mommy forgot to put the camera on video mode, but it doesn't really matter because I didn't sing. I spent the whole length of the song trying to climb into Mommy's arms or at least hide behind her.



(At least I wore my candle crown.)



There was also candle lighting and dancing, but I preferred to sit on Mommy's lap and watch.



On Sunday night, the first night of Chanuka, I tried to light the candles by myself. Par for the course. I did the same thing last year! (Click here to see.) This year we lit in front of the Webcam (twice) so both sets of grandparents could watch.

The next night I helped Mommy make latkes. I had one bite



and then just ate the "yummy sauce" (applesauce).



I have learned so much about Chanuka in school. On Sunday I came home so excited to show off all the "poddy-ets" (projects) I made, including a 3D paper dreidle and a felt chanukiya (Chanuka menorah) with candles that can be velcroed on each night.

After school today Mommy and I sang some Chanuka songs.



Ami: I am learning new things too. On erev Chanuka I discovered my fist and have been sucking it happily ever since.

Excuses, excuses

Daddy bought me two new books when he went to London. One was a book of fairy tales. I love The Three Little Pigs and insist on hearing it almost every night.

Today at nap time I chose the new Chanuka book instead. When I saw the candles I covered my eyes. (And when I see the Havdala candles I ask for Challah. It's so confusing.) When we got to the part about the Macabees I happily repeated "Maca-bee. Micky-bee. Macky-bee."

In a birthday goody bag today I got a plastic dreidle with chocolate coins inside. But I don't know they're chocolate. I think they're "dakka" and asked Mommy if I could put them in the "box!" She says I'm a mitzva girl.

In addition to "ceamup" (clean up) I now also say "seemup" (stand up). Today I told Mommy to sit and then added "Ami cry, seemup" - if Ami cries you can stand up! Then we played a game where I told Mommy to pretend she was sleeping and then told her to "seemup." She said it's not "seemup," it's "wake up," so then I told her to "weebup."

I call Mommy to come back into my room a million times after she puts me to bed. It used to be just to cover me or to bring me my blankie or a drink of water but now I have lots of other excuses. I need her to sing "Wock" (Rock-a-bye Baby, which unfortunately sounds like "walk" so sometimes she has trouble understanding me), "Ticku-Sah" (Twinkle Star) and "Boat" (Row Your Boat). I need her to sing "eyes" (Sh'ma) again.

Today I called "Mommy, help!" so Mommy came and asked me what I needed help with. I was looking at my fairy tale book and said "Page. Fwind it. Woof (wolf) ffffffff (blow) pigs." So Mommy found me the page. She keeps saying "This is the last time, I'm not coming in again." Yeah, right.

Party Time

When I woke up from my nap today Mommy told me we were going to the birthday party of a friend from school. Later she asked me to tell Daddy where we were going and I said "Pahlo." She was confused because she knows I can say the words "birthday" and "party." Then she realized I was trying to say "Betzalel." That's the name of the birthday boy.

At the party I had a bite of a bagel and then made my way over to the ice cream cake. They wanted to serve me, but before I would tell them which kind of cake I wanted I first had to choose my bowl. Each one was shaped like an animal and I sat on the floor looking through the whole stack for one shaped like a dog. I didn't find one, so I just used the very last bowl in the pile - a lobster.

Mommy's sorry that her camera is broken because it would have made a very cute picture when the two of us were sitting on the floor eating our ice cream cake, while Ami sat on Mommy's lap and watched.

After the cake I took one cookie for me and one for Mommy. But then I saw a girl eating grapes and asked Mommy to get me some. I went and put my half-eaten cookie back in the serving bowl, in exchange for a cup full of grapes. One of the mommies was very impressed and said she would be shepping nachas if her kid chose fruit over cookies.

Then I took another cookie for me and another one for Mommy and offered another one to a little girl. I took a bite or two of my cookie and put that one back in the serving bowl too.

All the kids were playing downstairs but I found a balloon and ran around the kitchen throwing it in the air and kicking it around. I also enjoyed looking in the full-size mirrors all over the house. When I found Betzalel's room I wanted to read ALL of his books.

I did not want to leave the party but Betzalel looked tired and Mommy said if we don't go home we can't come back to play another day. On the way home we listed all the junk I ate at the party - cookies, ice cream cake, a chocolate bar from my goody bag, and juice. I like saying "junk, junk, junk." Usually when we brush my teeth Mommy pretends she is finding different animals that are hiding in my mouth. Tonight she just brushed away all the different kinds of junk that were hiding in there!

In the car on the way home from the party I said "shoes off." Mommy said "Please don't take your shoes off, we're almost home." I took them off and then said "socks off." Mommy said "If you take your socks off you'll be very cold." After taking my socks off I said "Feet off!" You gotta hand it to me, I sure do have a sense of humor.